8 signs you’re dating a guy that is very secure


It’s past midnight and I am penning some thoughts about my experience of dating my boyfriend for the past 2 years. Entering a relationship is like entering a dense forest, it may leave you perplexed and lost or you can learn to find the peace and tranquillity that the nature offers…

How do you know that you are dating a guy that is very secured?

1. Freedom.

You get all the freedom and space if you are attached. He knows that this relationship is a commitment that both of you have made to one another and he trusts that the both of you will commit to that decision.

2. Trust

He trusts you and he is totally fine with you hanging out with your friends. Even guy friends because he knows that he can trust you and he knows that you know what you are doing.

3. He is independent and confident about his own self-image

He is not someone who would bug you for not texting him at all for the entire day because he understands that you must have been busy with stuff. He dresses well but does not ask for a second opinion from you because he is just confident about the choices he has made.

He knows where he wants to lead you in this relationship and you don’t have to worry whether his feeling for you will suddenly change and whether this relationship will still exist next year.

4. He is very busy carving out his career but doesn’t forget to support yours.

While he is chasing his dreams and working hard for the future with you, he does not forget about you. He is supportive of your visions and dreams and motivates you when you want to give up just because it is not easy. You are both committed to succeed together not just in your relationship but every other aspect of life.

5. He is self-motivated and he doesn’t really need you to be spur him own.

He reads and attends courses to hone his skills and takes pride in the saying that “learning doesn’t stop when you finish university”. You don’t have to motivate him to study or do something about his life because he KNOWS what he is doing.

6. His conversation with you is 70-80% serious stuff.

His conversation with you is either factual/ inspiring/ thought-provoking or motivating. He doesn’t waste time talking about how roses are sweet and violets are blue but motivating you to be better than the old you a year ago.

7. He loves to be a problem-solver.

He loves to help you and give you his opinion on any tricky situation you face.

8. He treats you with respect and not as a possession that he owns.

He doesn’t boss you around and control you like his possession but treats each moment spent with you as a blessing, even if it is just spending an hour train ride home with you, a short run in the morning on weekends or a meal.

Of course there are still times that my boyfriend and I argue over differing viewpoints, but I love how this quote always encourages me to count my blessings and treasure my loved ones, the people that God has specially placed in my life.

“Life is too short to argue and fight. Count your blessings, value your love ones and move on with your head held high.”

Share with me your thoughts and don’t forget to tag or comment about a friend who is just like that!

With Love,


Photography: Henzy David Photography

Coat: Love Bonito

* Follow me on Instagram: Wanderscence*




2 thoughts on “8 signs you’re dating a guy that is very secure

    1. Hi Tyll94,

      Who knows, the ‘one’ that you think doesn’t not offer you security might offer something else like kindness, affection, discipline, intelligence, or other character traits that are not as inferior than security. So you might not necessarily be settling for less 🙂 Most importantly, I think it is your commitment to one another. Are you able to accept everything that his or she is right now and commit to this relationship to make this work, even if this person might never change to how you imagined him/her to be.

      With Love,


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